"Once upon a time, I too was a late bloomer. I too eschewed encounters with everyone I thought might be gay as they just weren't my cup of tea. The problem though wasn't with me or with the gays, it was with what 'society' taught me was gay. One day though, it turned out that gay guys weren't just Will and Jack. They weren't the screamy loud people whose lives revolved around their sexuality, adorned in bright rainbow costumes with the butt-cheek cutaways."
What, exactly, is wrong with those who are loud, screamy queens prancing about with their butts hanging out? I am very glad that we recognize more and more that gay people come in a wide range of behaviors and colors and personalities (just like real people!), but the problem is that it seems like more and more it's become less "Yay, we're all different!" and more "Ugh, fags! Go away now so we can be boring straight conformists and/or all masculine with our beards and our sports. You're embarrassing us." That? Is just straight-up internal homophobia.
We gays, of all people, should be able to celebrate being different, and understand the importance of being able to be one's self, even when that self doesn't fit comfortably into the boxes and preconception-checklists society constructs. All human beings deserve such consideration. I'm not even particularly femmey, but I admire those who are, that have the guts to be themselves in the face of societal censure. That takes balls, balls I'm not sure I could muster. I can, to a certain extent hide (though I think I'm a flaming queen, and the kids at school certainly picked up on it, in the real world, apparently I don't act queeny enough for people to immediately glom on), but they can't, and they don't, but they shouldn't even have to contemplate it.
There definitely needs to be representation in the media and in the culture of a broader spectrum of the diversity of the homosexual experience. I just feel that part of the push for that from gay people involves far too much "queen-shaming" if I may coin a ridiculous term. The Jacks and Kurts and such exist and they should be represented, too. What would we be without them? We just need everyone else represented, too.
(I'm not saying, BTW, that you have to love every single gay person you meet, no matter what they act like. A lot of gay guys and lesbians and transgenders and every other permutation of sexuality/gender are assholes. Just like real people!)
/soapbox... for now. I'll let loose my screed about gay misogyny and lesbian separatism, and how gays and lesbians shouldn't be so alienated from each other as they sometimes are, and how we all should treat the transgendered with more understanding and acceptance, but that's for another time.
Anyway, if that was too many words for you, then this gets my point across, probably better than I do.