At this point, I think I'm just scared of sex. Three reasons:
1) I don't know what I'm doing, so it's just going to suck like all the other times I've tried it, and I won't even get to cum (just like all the other times).
2) It'll never live up to porn or Scott's life.
3) I'm afraid of mess or embarrassment, so I don't want flatulence or excrement or vomit ruining a sexual encounter, to become someone's tale of bad sex related to friends in tones alternately of disgust and amusement. But douching is actually very bad for your colon and I have a fairly strong gag reflex, so it looks like sex is just gonna be a theoretical concept forever.
8 comments:
you know you think that all the time till you meet a guy that knows what he's doing. than it gets really fun. just remember laughing during sex is proper and the sounds are par for the course. everything else can be washed off.
Thanks, Zeke. You're quite right. And it's not like I don't WANT to do it, I just need to find the right person (not necessarily in the "I want to be with him forever!" way, but in the "knows what the hell he's doing" way). And I do agree that sex doesn't have to be so deathly serious as is often thought. Laughter is good (as long as it's not the mocking, "THAT'S all you got?" kind).
well here's the easy rule of thumb, lick- thrust- repeat. use lot's of lube and go slow. drop me an email if you feel like it. I'm pretty easy going with the whole thing and honest.
O ye of the overthinking sex talk. Sex is not serious, it is ridiculous. It is ridiculous in a traveling side-show, God-is-laughing-at-you-right-now, sort of way. No one really knows what they're doing, as all the bodies are different, and you have to map out each person as you go. Just work on saying "do you like this?", "does that feel good?", and "should I stop?"; and practice a good moaning "un-huh" for yourself; everything else sorts itself out eventually.
Yeah, Frank. You're thinking too much again. Stop it already.
I agree with your other commentators. If you really think about sex, it's kind of absurd.
Also, if you aren't cumming, you need better lovers.
God, you really are thinking way too much about sex. That's a lot of pressure and then that's when things surely will go wrong. Just climb up on it and work it out.
Sex is like riding a horse -- awkward at first until you get the hang of it, then you get bored with trotting and just wanna bust into a gallop, and when you're done riding for a long time your get off and you walk all bow-legged :)
Damn I miss riding :)
Thank you, all, for the advice. I really am thinking about it too much. (It's soooooooooooo out of character, I know.)
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