Tuesday, July 31, 2007
The vaticinations of pundits seem to always be wrong.
Keep your ugly, froward child away from me!
A snake is almost by definition a flexuous creature.
She's a crackerjack Harry Potter fan.
I'm an exponent of cocooning .
Once inside they each hid in a old sack against the barn wall. The farmer went into the barn but did not see where they went, he was about to turn back when he saw three suspicious looking sacks. He walked forward and prodded the first sack with his gun. The Englishman inside said... ''Meow'.'
"Just cats," he thought.
He then prodded the second sack. The Welshman, hearing how the Englishman got off said... ''Woof'.'
"Just dogs," he thought.
As he walked towards the last sack, the Irishman worked out what he was going to say. As soon as the farmer prodded his sack he said... ''Potatoes!''
(Via Comedy Central Jokes)
Monday, July 30, 2007
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Friday, July 27, 2007
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Monday, July 23, 2007
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Thanks, says the guy, "It's the cutting edge of technology. I can telepathically ask this watch anything I want to know, and it'll answer me, telepathically."
"Rubbish," says the girl.
"No, it's true," says that guy. "Look, tell you what, I'll prove it. I'll ask it if you've got any panties on."
The guy scrunches up his eyes for a moment, as if concentrating hard to talk to his watch, then opens them and says, "Nope, it says you haven't got any panties on."
"Well, it's wrong," says the girl, "I do have panties on."
"Damn," says the guy, slapping his watch, "it's an hour fast!"
(Via Comedy Central Jokes)
Friday, July 20, 2007
I Always Thought Of All The Star Wars Characters, I Was Most Like C-3P0 (But More Because Of The Flaming Queeniness)
Your Score: Robot
You are 71% Rational, 14% Extroverted, 28% Brutal, and 42% Arrogant.
1. You are more RATIONAL than intuitive.
2. You are more INTROVERTED than extroverted.
3. You are more GENTLE than brutal.
4. You are more HUMBLE than arrogant.
Your exact opposite is the Class Clown.
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.
The other personality types:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
Be sure to take my Sublime Philosophical Crap Test if you are interested in taking a slightly more intellectual test that has just as many insane ramblings as this one does!
About Saint_GasolineI am a self-proclaimed pseudo-intellectual who loves dashes. I enjoy science, philosophy, and fart jokes and water balloons, not necessarily in that order. I spend 95% of my time online, and the other 5% of my time in the bathroom, longing to get back on the computer. If, God forbid, you somehow find me amusing instead of crass and annoying, be sure to check out my blog and my webcomic at SaintGasoline.com.
|Link: The Personality Defect Test written by saint_gasoline on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test|
(Via Maud Newton)
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Anyway, I was contacted a few days ago by a man with the fabulous name of Raz Godelink about this really cool-looking new green business called Eco-Libris. (Lords of the Internet only know how he found this blog and why he bothered to email me, but I'm just tickled pink.) I've put a slightly-modified version of the email I got from him below, so you can get some info and check it out. It really sounds neat.
My name is Raz Godelnik and I thought you might be interested to learn about Eco-Libris, a new green biz I co-founded that lets book readers balance out the paper used for their books, and of a special celebration and free offer we're having for the release of the new Harry Potter.
Eco-Libris helps book lovers go green and plant a tree for every book they read. About 20 million trees are being cut down every year to produce paper for books sold in the U.S. alone. By partnering with non-profit organizations in developing countries, Eco-Libris can now invite readers to do something about it in its new website.
The process itself is fairly simple - upon entering the website, customers decide how many books they would like to balance out. They then pay online and a tree is planted for each of these books. Customers also receive a sticker from Eco-Libris, made of recycled paper, for every book they balance out, saying "One Tree was Planted for this Book," which they can later display on their books' sleeves.
Now we celebrate with J.K. Rowling and Harry Potter’s fans the release of the new Potter book (though we’re sad it’s the last one). As you may know, the new Harry Potter books are being published on partially or fully recycled paper worldwide. So for us, Harry Potter is not only a great story; it also sets an example for the future of the book publishing industry, and a vision which we share. To show our appreciation to the courageous author and to the young magician we’ll be celebrating by letting Harry Potter fans plant new trees and win a free copy, made of 100% recycled paper, of the new book.
To participate in "Eco-Libris and The Green Wizards" promotions, Harry Potter's fans need to send a picture of themselves posing with any of the books in the series. The first 50 people to do so will receive a special gift - seven trees planted for them in developing countries, to balance out seven of their books in honor of the seven books in the Potter series. They will also receive seven Eco-Libris stickers saying “One Tree was Planted for This Book” to be proudly displayed on their books sleeves.
Our judges will pick the best photo of all and we'll send a free copy of the new Harry Potter, printed on 100% recycled paper, to the gifted photographer.
So please check out our website and our special Harry Potter celebration page and let me know what you think. We try to spread the word about us to all the book lovers, greenies and everyone in between. If you could feature us at your site that really would be great! I'll be happy to answer any questions you may have and of course we are open to link exchanges. Thanks!
For more information on Eco-Libris, you are welcome to check our news release.
Thank you again for your time.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Hey, Toby, FHC, could you get some of your DC gays together and kick these fellows asses, please?
(Via Maud Newton)
Monday, July 16, 2007
So, any quirky penises out there looking for a solid, retiring (but full of get-up-and-go when needs be), slightly inexperienced (but eager to learn), sometimes painfully stiff-necked (but generally affable and eager-to-please) penis? Fats welcome, but no fems.
(No offense to the lady-dick or the clitoris, but the latter comes with... other things far too yeasty for my tastes, and the former would belong to a tranny, and I'd probably be eaten alive by my fierce transgendered sistren.)
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Anyway, I would come downstairs in my pjs and watch TV, specifically old reruns. I watched Bewitched and I Dream of Jeannie, then some Gilligan's Island, followed by such more then-current fare such as It's a Living and this show with Jim J. Bullock and the guy from The Mary Tyler Moore Show living in a San Francisco house, where there was a room with a big-ass rainbow painted on the wall (feel the subtext!).
A few years later, my night owl tendencies manifested themselves. Thus, I spent many nights watching Nick at Night (back when it was good and not running reruns of Roseanne). My regular shows included: Get Smart, Dragnet, The Dick Van Dyke Show, The Lucy Show, and MST3K. Those were good times.
Friday, July 13, 2007
Also, what's up with all the profiles without pictures? Vince is so right: if you're going to post a profile on a dating/hook-up site, YOU NEED AN ACCURATE PICTURE! I don’t have a camera and have no idea how to actually get any pics I might be able to take with my phone OUT of said phone, but even I have some (totally G-rated that I don’t like anymore and need to change) pics to send/post! If I can do it, people, you can do it! Even if you’re ugly or whatever, it’s always better to be upfront about everything; there’s someone for everyone, but if you lie or whatever, all you’ll get is someone pissed off instead of someone who’s actually into you.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Saturday, July 07, 2007
Friday, July 06, 2007