Friday, July 11, 2008

In The Presence of Greatness

I had the honor and privilege this evening to bask in the radiance of the divine, the delectable, the delicious, the one, the only, Chi Chi LaRue at the 14th Annual Philadelphia International Gay & Lesbian Film, where she showed an "ego trip" film of highlights of her career. A series of hardcore clips, interspersed with music, B-roll highlights of her non-sexual roles, and snapshots of her encounters with celebrities, the best part was the hilarious running commentary Ms. LaRue provided like Tom Servo in a huge blonde wig and heels. Ms. LaRue was resplendant in a Stevie Nicks-esque sparkly, flowy, chiffony number, with matching high heels and astoundingly teased wig. She is a born raconteur, and had us audience members eating out of the palm of her hand. Charming, bawdy, and just plain entertaining, she was born to be in front of a crowd.

Accompanying Ms. LaRue were two of her stable of stars, Johnny Hazzard and Blake Riley. Not that it's THAT shocking, but they are hooooooot. Seriously, Johnny Hazzard is stunningly beautiful, and Blake Riley totally sweet boy-next-door (who also happens to be a porn star) cute. Scott, you have got to lasso them into your dungeon of iniquity. Riley is totally in your prey-base, and Hazzard is one of those "dirty birds" you love so much. I was particularly interested in seeing how tall they were, because porn stars are notorious for being a lot shorter in real life than you'd think (it makes them look bigger), but it was hard to tell from the distance and the fact that they were standing next to a drag queen in high heels and hair teased halfway up to the ceiling. I can say, though, thanks to their tight shirts and painted-on jeans that I don't quite know how they got on they were so snug, especially Mr. Riley's, that they are ripped.

The raison d'etre of the event was the film, but really the heart of the show was the Q&A. I was lucky enough to have been able to ask two questions, one to Ms. LaRue and one to Messrs. Hazzard and Riley. The one to Ms. LaRue was if she was ever going to write another book. She answered that she'd really written the first one too early in her career, and it took so long and was so tedious to write that she's not sure if she'd want to do another one, but it was something she probably should do, so the answer was "a definite maybe." The question to the porn star pair was, "Has porn expanded your sexual repetoir, as it were, or were you always a whore?" Blake Riley said, to the guffaws of the crowd, that he'd been a whore before, but the movies had definitely stretched his horizons and taken him out of his comfort zone. Johnny Hazzard, who seems a laconic sort who doesn't waste or mince words, which I found inexplicably a turn-on, said he actually has less sex now that he does porn than he did before because he's a bit bored of it. I was quite pleased with myself that I got two questions in, though I must admit I kind of regretted the "or were you always a whore" part of the second one. I was jesting, but porn stars probably hear that stuff all the time, and often in less-than-flattering terms, and I'm afraid I may have insulted them, which I didn't mean to at all. I have nothing but respect for those who put literally everything out there for the world to see.

Anyway, a great time was had by all, and I even walked away with a goody bag with free porn in it, courtesy of TLA Entertainment, Philly's own DVD distribution powerhouse and my own personal porn purveyor of choice. If you ever get a chance to meet Ms. LaRue, grab it. She's a hoot-and-a-half and a sincerely fabulous person.

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