Sunday, April 29, 2007

"Life Is A Banquet, And Most Poor Suckers Are STARVING To Death!"

Caught one of my favorite movies of all time, Auntie Mame, the other night, appropriately enough on Logo. Is there no gay boy who doesn't dream of having an Auntie Mame? Or, to be more honest, be Auntie Mame? Brought to life by the incomparable Rosalind Russell, the larger-than-life aunt is every gay man's dream: glamorous parties, dashing beaux, madcap adventures, living life with zest and gusto and moxie, not taking crap from anyone!

Though I'm more like Auntie Lame (if, as the most famous line in the movie says, "life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death," I am an anorexic), I got to thinking about how my blogging life might stack up with Mame's.

This blog, of course, is Beekman Place.

Scott, you're my Vera, the drama queen star best friend, who never has too many martinis or mens. She's a drunken hoor, basically. Fits you to a T, eh?

GayProf, you're Agnes. Take off the glasses and you're Queen of Romania! And I just know you have a bust. Care for a Dr. Pepper?

Vince, you're O'Bannion, with poetry in your soul, and randy thoughts in your head.

Bigg and Gunn, you're my Ito and Norah. Just as Mame's faithful servants make her life possible, my blog simply wouldn't function without your faithful readership and commentary. Now, could one of you pick up my dry cleaning? Oh, and make sure you pay the butcher soon. Take the Duesenberg.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some sparkly capri pants with matching duster/cape to try on. *swirls out of the room, cigarette holder held aloft*


Dr. Sparky said...


Thanks, buddy. I think that describe me perfectly. :o)

GayProf said...

This doesn't mean I am pregnant, does it?

When a mere lad, I saw this movie. I was very intrigued by the idea of attending a school where the male teachers got naked.

Gunn said...


I think I've only sat through 10 minutes of this movie so I'm not quite sure what you're talking about but it sounds complimentary, so thanks.

Frank said...

Vince: No problems!

GayProf: No, you don't have to be in a "delicate condition." Remember, though, that the female teachers are naked as well.

Gunn: You simply MUST watch it someday, Gunn!

Hubbard said...


Try reading Patrick Dennis's book some time. It's got scenes that were too scandalous for when the movie came out, like Patrick (and Mame's) misadventurous sex lives.

Random thought: could a movie that fabulous get made today? Or would they gunk up Mame? Knowing Hollywood, I'd imagine they'd try to put Gwyneth Paltrow as the lead. Could anyone today pull off Mame?