Monday, January 01, 2007

Resolutions

  • Get laid.
  • Get a job.
  • Be less neurotic.
  • Be less anxious about stupid crap.
  • Get some gay friends to hang out with.
  • Get some straight male friends to hang out with.
  • Get a wise older lesbian and/or bitter, jaded drag queen who secretly has a heart of gold to mentor me.
  • Have more fun.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

that's a pretty good list... i may take some of those!

Anonymous said...

Happy New Year, Frank. Keep up the good blogging and good luck with the resolutions.

Frank said...

Dr. Dave: Feel free!

Jay: Feel free!

Gunn: Happy New Year to you, too, Gunn! Good luck with your resolutions, too. And just when are YOU going to join the Dark Side and start blogging? Hmmmmmmm?

Anonymous said...

Best. New Years Resolutions. Ever.

I particularly support the idea of straight friends and drag queen mentors. Once you are adept at handling the girls you need to get a drag queen posse. They're great traveling companions and can get you into clubs for free.

Frank said...

I also have the sneaking suspicion, Scott, that a drag queen or two would get me laid a lot more.

No offense, BTW, but I didn't peg you for a drag queen supporter. Sadly, a lot of "butch" gay men don't want anything to do with them.

Anonymous said...

Have I never told you about my drag queen posse? Headed up by Shequida, the now deceased Brandywine and her sister Brenda A Go-Go w/ a running appearance by Hedda Lettuce and super DJ Honey Dijon.

For some reason I always seem to get "adopted" by drag queens. Usually fierce muscular black girls. It's great to go out with a crew of them because they tend to fight over you, always trying to one up the other for your attention. The down side is that if the competition gets too ferocious sharp, edged weapons can come into play.

gothamwhore said...

Your new years resolutions are hilarious! If you can't find a suitable Drag Queen mentor, then try opting for a black gay mother from the Ball scene. Equally as amusing and also could probably get you into clubs for free.

Honestly, I think everyone gets into clubs for free, so that shouldn't be a determining factor.

Lesbians are scary, though. I'll take a woman-man over a man-woman any day!